what could it be?

Poor sweet Vaughn-elise. She is a mess! Her rash has gone from bad to ugly in a matter of a couple days. Benedryl is not helping... so finally today I took her to the doctor, after she started getting liesons and it took over her face I decided enough is enough. They said it looked similar to measles but it was not a bright enough red or something and there has been no reported measles o utbreaks in Iowa so they dont think thats it. THey said its not from an allergic reaction or the benedryl would have helped. BAsically they dont knwo what it is but think its caused by a virus that has chosen to eliminate itslef through the skin instead of through a stuff nose etc. They checked her over and said she is also suffering from ANOTHER ear infection (even though we were just in there and they said she was fine just 10 days ago?!) and she has a raw throat. Poor baby girl. She's a tropper though and acting just fine. I went to walgreens to pick up the three prescriptions that they gave her and waited for almost 30 minutes and they still didnt have them ready so we decided to leave and go out later. She did say she doesnt think its anything contagious and to just watch how VE is acting. IF its not gone in a week to come back. Im thankful that its nothing serious (they dont think) but frustrated that theyd ont know what is causing it. I guess if she is acting fine thats a good sign though!
She is sleeping now but I will try to get some pictures of her tonight after her bath and will post them so you can all see what it looks like. It started out looking like hives and now looks like chicken pox (but its not) all over her back and some of the clumps are quarter size. Its so sad. It just looks miserable. They think the liesions could be from her scratching at it so much that she is tearing the skin so they also gave me some medicated ointment to put on those spots.

Keep her in your prayers!

Some holiday cheer!

gma, papa and uncle matt with VE on Chrismtas morning. Not sure why my camera was being dumb and taking blurry pics. GRRR

The santas

papa with the babies

Drinking from the famous Christmas breakfast tiny glasses. WE are all fighting over who they will be left to in the will.

Her favorite gift (stocking stuff) of all. her bubbles. Who would have known!?

Christmas morning

Opening her stocking

She loved her new books from santa...

Mommy's stocking, VE's stocking and daddy's stocking all lined up

Dont know what she's eating....?

Christmas was great! I hope you all had an awesome holiday! I cannot believe its over again for another year! thats so depressing. I just love Christmas. As always the "we really cut back this year" did not hold true and we got a lot of really great gifts from everyone! I am excited to get home from the Quad cities and get settled back in at home so i can get all my stuff put away and get Vaughn's new toys switched with some older ones. She did great and just loved time with everyone! Christmas eve was lots of fun getting to see and hang out with everyone. We played some fun games this year too and did a fun white elephant gift exchange. It is very sad watching my grandparents age and its always sad that everyone has to take off so early. If we had it our way everyone would stay until late playing cards and drinking eggnog. I wish family got to gether more often, for no reason and not just on the holidays. We will have to work harder at that.

Vaughn-elise has had a rash since she woke up Christmas morning. It is my thinking that she ate somethign on Christmas eve that she was allergic to. It has not gone away yet so tonight I started giving her some benedryl as recommended by the pharmacist. Neither rudy nor i gave her anything new but its easy for her to grab food off of someone's plate, the counter or for someone to give her a friendly bite so we're not sure what she ate really. I feel horrible for her, her poor little armpits are covered in bumps and her entire back and under diaper area, legs, arms and now hands and face. It looks horrible. Poor thing. She doesnt seem too bothered by it, other than being a little more emotional than normal.

We are in the quad cities now doing Christmas with Rudy's family. The weather here is so strange. When we left for his sisters house it was 56 and a serious downpour of rain, thunder and

lightening. within 3o minutes the sky was green and we were under a tornado warning. Within another hour or two the weather had dropped to 20 degrees and the roads were covered in a thick sheet of ice. We were not back to rudy's for 3o minutes before ambulances and cops were just down the street and rudy went out to my car to get something and fell and scraped up his leg. Its nuts. Probably the WEIRDEDST weather day Ive ever seen.

I went out some on Friday for the after Christmas sales and got some great deals on wrapping paper and ornaments, gift tags etc. I could have spent hundreds of dollars on clearance holiday items but broke me could only afford a little bit. I look forward to using it next year though. I am starting to think that gift wrapping and excessories is the buisness to be in! Its so expensive and everyone needs it (birthdays, christmas etc.) and i can never find the kind of design I am looking for or the perfect package accessories. Maybe I need to hook up with target and come up with my own line?!?!

Anyways, I hope everyone had a very merry Christmas and I wish you all a safe and happy new year.

Sorry I have not posted these last few days. The hustle and bustle of gettting ready for the holidays is consuming me:) We were unable to go to the quad cities for Christmas with Rudy's family this weekend due to the weather. (though now looking at it it would have been fine- the weather men made it sound like a terrible mess was coming. ) So we kept busy with other things. I cannot remember exactly what we did but i know it was a busy weekend! Saturday I put up my own tree and since it was way too huge to go in the bedroom, Dad and I cleaned the basement out and made a nice cozy area for it down there. I now have all of "santa's" presents and those from rudy and I to each other down there. They look like so few under that monster of a tree. Sunday we went to church and then did some baking and Monday I helped my mom get ready for company and we cleaned...alot. I am just finishing making crab cakes for Christmas eve and also puppy chow. I am so excited to see everyone and I have been getting so excited for Christmas all around this year. Vaughn-elise helped make a countdown chain a few weeks ago and even though she doesnt know what its for, when she see's me get it out she is so excited to pull one of. Its adorable. We painted her nails yesterday- its so stinking cute. It makes her hands look "not babyish" though which is a little sad. She is learning how to play for very short periods of time by herself. This is nice for me and really shows how much she is growing up and changing. I still have to keep an eye on her all the time but she will sit for about 10 minutes or so and read books when I am doing something else or she will play with her toys in the hallway for a bit without wandering. I just love watching her when she is into something and you can see her mind just a spinning. I wonder what she is thinking about most of the time. Sometimes she just gets very sad. It breaks my heart. She will just be sitting there and then all of a sudden she gets the saddest face and her lip pouts and her eyes water and she will just look at you like "is it okay to break down right now." It breaks my heart. She did it today in walmart too. Just riding in the cart and then all of a sudden she looked very sad and embarrassed. I wanted to cry for her. My eyes were all teary and she just started sobbing. I dont know what sets it off- its so random. It is the worst feeling to see that.

On a better note...

I hope everyone is excited and feels the magic of the holidays! I hope you all have a safe and Merry Christmas. Remember to set cookies out for santa!!

where is that storm anyways?

The End result...

Put your hands up for some sugar cookies...!

Trying to get the sprinkles on the cookie....

A powdered sugar princess...

:)

Is it just me or are we supposed to be iced in by now????!!! Its frustrating to plan on being locked in doors only to find that its a perfectly pleasent day out and you could have planned to do something else. Something fun.

We baked cinnimon sugar cookies today- delicious! Vaughn-elise helped (honestly) as you can tell by the tiny finger prints in the cookies . Dont worry her hands were well washed. She didnt frost them becasue it was difficult but did help with the sprinkles...I let her have one knowing she wouldnt know what to do with it, and she played with it and would take a small bite or two and then "hide it" on her lap and say " all gone, more??...more?!" What a trickster.

big time ouchy....

Today was horrible. Just horrible. I woke up in an okay mood...as the day went on, it got worse. Midway through the day about 12:50 we were playing in the living room. Vaughn was getting tired but due to her early desire to go to bed lately I was trying to keep her up until 2. She was playing and running around and then before I could catch her she tripped on her feet and smacked her face into the edge of the brick fireplace. I was terrified to see her face and sure enough its banged up. Above her left eye is all raw and scraped up and her eye is swollen. I wanted to throw up and I am sure she felt the same way. Of course I was out of infant pain reliever and of course it was storming so I could not take her out in it. She did okay and within an hour was back to normal. She did go to bed extra early tonight and I am sure she has had the biggest headache all day. Broke my heart. She kept pointing to her eye and saying "no no". I felt so bad I just wanted to hold her all day. that has to be the worst feeling in the world- watching your baby get hurt.

good ole family time

Yesterday was a great day. I needed it! Church had thier childrens program that was really cute- it was very different than the "traditional program" (which i miss seeing) but was interactive and a neat way to get a glimpse into the life of that time when Christ was born...you really felt like you were walking the busy streets of bethleham. We came home and Matt and Maria came over for lunch and shortly after rudy came too. We sat around for HOURS until about 7 ish at night just playing board games and cards. We took VE's Christmas photos. I didnt like the family ones so I am just using the ones of her for the cards. (which i am excited to get sent out.) I cannot believe Christmas is just a week and a half away! we are going to Bettendorf this weekend to do Chrismtas with Rudy's family. I really hope the weather cooperates as I do not want to travel if the roads are nasty.

Oh yeah- we had our cookie exchange on Saturday as well with the women from church. It was fun- we got lots of delish cookies and some great girl time in.

VE has been going to sleep SO EARLY!!! Like 5:30 or 6 ish!!! I cannot keep her awake and if i do it is complete chaos due to her being so tired! She must just be growing so much or something. She sleeps all night too. Last night she went to sleep at 10 til 6 and slept til 7:30 this morning! I guess if she needs the sleep.....!?? We are transitioning to one nap per day so that might be causing the need for extra sleep...maybe she is not ready for the transition?? Who knows. Sigh.

We are going to stay inside this week as much as possible. It is -2 outside right now with a windchill of - 24. Yup negetive 24. Thats winter in iowa for you....no snow though. i hate that. if its going to be butt cold then it should at least be snowy and pretty right? Hopefully there will be snow on Christmas at least. I really need to run to the store and get some food for VE but I will not be taking her out in this weather. the news said frostbite will occur within just a couple minutes to any exposed skin! YIKES!!!! So I will either be getting creative or having someone else stay home with her. Well I gotta go tend to the babe....will do better about writing daily and will post pics later today!

Do you believe in Ghosts?

I do. this may be weird, but i 100% believe in them. in another realm that most people dont tap into. I think some spirits do stay here on earth and I cannot quite figure out why that is yet. Ever since I got very sick when I was 7 I have seen things, felt things etc. I dont tell alot of people this because they think im weird and stupid. I started seeing things in Chariton in the big house. I was very sick and i saw a lady in my sisters doorway (my mom and sister and dad can attest to the terror I felt that night when i saw her.) the image has stuck with me, open arms, long white tattered dress, long blond straight hair, wierd rigid features. She was beautiful and terrifying. Ever since then, i havent seen her, but others. Sometimes it just seems normal, ill be walking and see someone going down the hallway or sitting somewhere or leaving a room and i double take and then realize its no one there. Tonight, i m having a VERY weird night. I cannot stop looking over my shoulder, its that weird feeling that someone is watching you or around, i hear footsteps and its just VE and i home....i hear doors opening etc. Its terrifying. The fireplace door just opened. I want someone to come home and be here....its petrifying. its not my imagination...its daily occurances that turn scary sometimes. Rudy can attest, he's been there when the scary things happen, when i wake up and trully believe someone is in the room, i can see them, describe what they are wearing, the look on their face, etc. i have only seen men. I trully believe that it has something to do with being so close to death and that somehow my body now tunes into something else. I cannot explain it and I just wish it was gone- I cannot stand it. Nothing physical ever happens to me, but I wake up often and see three men in my room. middle aged, gross looking men, one always by my door sitting with his knees up to his chest and arms folded on his knees staring at me, and one one either side of the bed staring down. the same three men, my whole life. anyways, think im crazy....and nights like this- i feel like i am too. I hate this creepy uneasy feeling. Rudy is coming over....hopefully that helps.

lazy day

Vaughn-elise's first Christmas ornament EVER!

This is the new obsession, riding around in this wagon...or standing in it as is the case most days.

Today is pretty boring. I did find one of the items I wanted for Chrismtas ( a heated towel warmer) for a FRACTION of the cost, so I was pumped. Its very cold in my bathroom and I hate giving VE a bath because she freezes so I thought it would be great to be able to bundle in warm towels when we are done. Now that i think of it, I am sure a space heater would have worked as well, but those get hot to the touch- anyways. Also took a nap with Vaughn which i have not done....in a couple months so that was relaxing and nice. Though I always get thrown off becuase there are so many things i like to do when she is asleep (pick up, laundry, shower, wrap gifts) that I feel strange when I wake up and havent done any of that.

Its almost the weekend and we are having a cookie exchange party with church here at my moms house so I am trying to find a few great recipes to share...

The Count Down is ON!!!!

I am very much now in the Christmas mood. I think not having my own place to decorate has put a little "bah humbug" in my step lately. If anyone knows me, you all know that I am the CHRISTMAS obsessed, listening to carols starting August, Spending more on paper and ribbons than on gifts, decorating freak. I have always gotten this strong sense of peace and joy around the holidays and whenever around Chrsitmas things...i never have a problem when Chrsitmas stuff is in stores before halloween! I just decided today that I need to snap out of it. I have a ton to be thankful for...so much and Iwant to make this year special for Vaughn just as I would in my own aparmtnet. I wanted to move to the basement so I felt like i had my own place and could put up my own tree and the holiday decor that I got at the Color drive in October....but sicne that was nixed right away i decided heck with it, I will decorate my room as much as I can. So today I spent all day cleaning and organizing and then rearranged my room. I am getting my new (bought off craigslist for way cheap this summer) tree in my room and decorate it. I removed all the pictures in my room and put up all my christmas pictures and decorations. I am excited. I have been wrapping lately and even though I did not have money to spend alot this year on bows and ribbon, i did throw down 8 dollars to get new bows and have enjoyed wrapping all my gifts and looking at them shimmer. I love it, its so magical and amazing. I TRULLY hope Vaughn has the same child like excitement for the holidays as i do for her entire life! Rudy has no fond memories of the holidays. He says they did not decorate, he knows not one Christmas song, he doesnt buy gifts for his family and depending on the year he will get gifts or not. I find it trully sad that such a huge amazing holiday could be looked on with such a "blase" feel. I hope Vaughn does not feel that way about holidays, and moreso, I hope I do a good job at making things special and exciting for her so that she remembers always our traditions and fun things we do around the holidays so she wants to do those things with her children someday.
She made her first tree ornament the other night...she was so cute and got so excited putting it on the tree. She didnt get it obviously but I made a huge deal about it so she was excited too....I need to post some pictures but have misplaced the cord that goes from my camera to computer so I need to hunt that down and then will have lots to post.

Happy Holidays to you all!!!!!!

A Little Charity Work....

Today I rang bells for the Salvation Army's Red Kettle Charity. I was at Kmart. Although it was a bit chilly it really was an awesome experience and something I plan to do every year from now on. I cannot wait until VE is old enough to go. When I got there, there was a big group of 7-8 year old kids and a chaperone and they were all singing Christmas Carols. It was soo stinking cute.
It was really interesting to watch people's reactions to the whole thing. Some of them avoided eye contact, others felt their pockets and walked on by, many stopped and told me how much they appreciate people standing in the cold to do that, others stopped to tell me when they are scheduled to ring bells, some said they admired me for taking time out of my day to do that, others threw in 100's, 20's, 10's etc....it was really crazy. I figured people would all be the same, throw in a buck and keep going. Thats what I usually do. No more! I didnt think people really took the time to appreciate that people take time out of thier lives to do that....not that its about that- but it takes alot of people to make that program suceed and my measly afternoon was nothing compared to the dedication some people put into it. Someone had to come and dump the money midway through my shift and that was so neat. It was sweet to see parents giving their children money to put in there and telling them that by doing that they are helping to make tough times easier on someone, some explained that it was helping other kids get holiday gifts. It was just neat.

As weird as it sounds, i think it would have been even better if it had been snowing- it would have really felt like Christmas then.

i encourage anyone who has an extra couple of hours to volunteer to do this- its a great thing. www.ringbells.org

happy holidays!

19 days til Christmas!!!!

Last night I met a friend in town that I hadnt seen in almost 6 years. It was nice to catch up. We got coffee, a bite to eat and then I helped her find a Chrismtas dress and was able to FINISH the rest of the shopping I had to do. (except for VE and rudy's stocking...)
Today has been a very lazy day- rudy came over to play with Ve this morning, I baked some cookies, we have played, not alot going on. I am super anxious to start wrapping presents- thats my alltime favorite part! I need to get some pretty bows and ribbons and then I can get started! I like to have the wrapped so i can sort of forget what I bought everyone- its more fun when they open it that way, Im suprised too:)

Tomorrow I am ringing the salvation army bells....all alone:( I wanted to do it, and still do, but I will probably feel like a freezing idiot all alone out there. I will have to bundle as its supposed to be a FREEZING day. Starbucks you will be coming with me! It is only for 2 hours so I should manage okay. hopefully it will make me feel cheery and holiday like. who knows. aparently they have hardly anyone volunteering to do it this year so I am glad I signed up.

Let it snow...let it snow....let it snow!

SO, I hate driving in the snow, but I LOVE the snow. This morning I bundled VE up in tons of layers and scarves and hat and gloves and a big winter coat and snow boots and out we went to play in the snow. UNFORTUNATELY I left my camera at thanksgiving, but i did take my video camera...it was hillarious. And apparently Sadie dog thought VE was a giant pink salt block or something becuase she wouldnt stop jumping on her or licking her. VE didnt mind but it was annoying me cause i had to keep stopping the tape and yelling at sadie. it was fun! i am glad we got to go out...it was cold but nice to get outside again and play. We do have to work on figuring out how to move in all that get up! She was overjoyed and ate snow off her mittens, shoes (brand new, not dirty) and coat when we got in until it all melted. then she cried.

Nothing expected going on this week...just trying to stay busy with fun, new things...some crafts, probably a few trips to town, some wrapping. I am ready for Christmas and for VE to get some new toys because we are both getting tired of the ones she's been playing with for months. That might sound bad- but she's bored and im sick of the same songs....they need to be put up for a while and brought back out in a few months....

Happy snow man building to you all!